Sunday, December 27, 2009

Day 816 - At the Movies with Crazy Grandma

When we visit my family in Sacramento, there are several things we do after we put the kids to sleep: play card games, mock Crazy Grandma, or watch movies. My dad is pretty open to most movies, but Crazy Grandma is a tougher cookie to crack. Although one of Crazy Grandma's favorite movie is Face/Off ("So cleeeever! Dey switch face!"), her taste tends to point towards the wholesome and entertaining. She really loves comedies, but frowns upon nudity, language, and sex. So with that criteria I decided the family would watch the classic cinematic comedy...The Hangover.

Watching a movie with Crazy Grandma is always an experience because she loves to talk. She'll comment on confusing plot points ("Wait! Dat woman a man?"), things she likes that has nothing to do with the movie ("I rike parrots!"), and ask for a summary because she dozed off ("Wha happen? I fall sleep!"). So I decided I would type some of the commentary she spewed off while watching The Hangover. Enjoy!

ON SCREEN: Doug, the groom, is getting fitted for his tuxedo.
CRAZY GRANDMA SAYS: "Who dat? Why he wear suit?"

ON SCREEN: Alan, the brother-in-law, shows his butt while getting fitted for his tuxedo.
CRAZY GRANDMA SAYS: "Ah! Why do I need to see butt? If I waz in movie theatah, his butt would be so big on movie screen! I no want to see dat? Ack!"

ON SCREEN: Someone is peeing.
CRAZY GRANDMA SAYS: "Bathroom scene? Why they show him pee? I don't want to see his thingy pee!"

CRAZY GRANDMA SAYS: "Is this rated R?"

ON SCREEN: Mr. Chow jumps out of a car naked.
CRAZY GRANDMA SAYS: "Dis crazy! What he do in car naked? Ack! You see everything! hmm..kinda small. HAHAHA!"

CRAZY GRANDMA SAYS: "Hey? Where did the groom go? Why he no with his friends?"

ON SCREEN: The friends are winning money at blackjack.
CRAZY GRANDMA SAYS: "Did you put cream on Emma after you change her diapah? She get rashy. You need to make sure you put lot of cream on her because her skin very sensahtive."

Eat your heart out, Roger Ebert!

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