Day 322 - Private Matters

The kids have discovered something: their private parts.

Emma was the first one to discover that she had something inside her diaper besides a pound of turd. I'd say three or four weeks ago, I was changing Emma's diaper and she started to touch herself. I didn't know what to do so I called for Lisa.

"Lisa! Emma's touching herself! What do I do?"

"Get her a magazine!"

...haha...hardeeharhar. Since I was on my own, I just pushed Emma's hand away. And back it came. I held her hand down, and her other hand entered the playing field. What kind of perverted daughter do we have?

The bigger problem with Emma's handy work is when she fills her diaper up with crap. Not only do we have to contend with the vah-jay-jay playground, but all of the poop in the playground too.

As for Andrew, it was probably just a week ago when I was giving him a bath and he discovered his holiday yule log between his legs. After soaping his body up, Andrew tried to pick up his fish toy in the tub. The fish fell between his legs. He picked up the fish and did a double take as he noticed his tackle box open. Then what happened next was pretty comical. Andrew stared at his penis. After a few seconds, Andrew extended his pointer finger and then poked his penis once. His head raised and he stared at me as if to say, "You knew about my penis this whole time and never took the time to explain it to me?"

Both of these experiences made me feel very awkward. The sad thing about it is that it's just going to get more awkward and complicated in the future. Yet in the same way that I once believed I could never change a poopy diaper for fear of getting poopy in my fingernails, when the day came when I got poopy in my fingernails I was able to deal with it.

Additionally, I've always felt a little uncomfortable when the topic of sex and/or things associated with sex (i.e. penis, vagina, D batteries) are brought up. I do hope I will be the kind of parent who will be able to talk to their kids about these kinds of things. Although I might not be the best person to talk to when it comes to sex. I didn't know what a vagina was until someone told me to stop touching their butthole (Thanks Lisa!).