Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Day 387 - Public Emma-ny

Lisa and my parents call Andrew a rascal. I told them that he's not a rascal, he's just curious about things. They're just reflecting an adult interpretation of being mischievous and unscrupulous to an innocent child who is just trying to discover the world. How DARE they label Andrew a rascal. Humph.

Well, I was mistaken. Take a look at these pictures:

Not only is Andrew a rascal, but he's a baby terrorist! I'd call Andrew my little Osama, except I know exactly where he is and what he is doing. The other day I caught Andrew underneath Emma's crib taping all of his soiled diapers to her mattress. Keep an eye on this one!

I don't think Andrew means to terrorize his little sister. He actually enjoys being around her, and that's the problem. When you mix someone who is very active and physical (i.e. Andrew) and another person who is more contemplative and sensitive (i.e. Emma), you end up with a crying mess.

When the two of them are playing together, a meltdown will happen because: 1) Andrew pulls Emma's hair. 2) Andrew knocks Emma down. 3) Andrew falls on top of Emma. 4) Andrew takes Emma's toy. 5) Andrew duct tapes Emma to a hand dolly, pushes her to a busy intersection on Ventura Blvd, tapes a sign on her forehead that says "Baby for Sale", and pours dog food on her feet for feral street animals to feast on. I wouldn't worry about #5 happening again because we hid the hand dolly.

Lisa and I could easily separate the kids and have them play on opposite sides of the room, but we think that defeats the purpose of having another sibling. Shouldn't the kids learn that they need to share? Shouldn't the kids learn that they need to respect each other? Shouldn't the kids learn not to tape "Baby for Sale" signs on their forehead? The kids need to learn how to be friends and they will never learn if we keep them apart.

Maybe the kids are a little too young to understand these lessons, but one day they will. In the meantime, Lisa and I will supervise the kids and make sure Andrew doesn't bother his sister too much. And if there's one thing I can teach Andrew, it is to respect girls. Because if you don't, you may find yourself charged with a felony and sentenced to jail for 30 days despite your argument that it was all a misunderstanding and everyone was under the influence of bad mushrooms.

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