Day 138 - Grandma Ichinaga's Back in Town

After a three week stay with us in December 2007, Grandma Ichinaga returned home exhausted and with a case of the shingles. Lisa suggested to her mom that the next time she visit she might want to stay for a shorter amount of time. Grandma Ichinaga answered with a different solution: I'm not coming down again.

Well eat your words! This past Monday I picked up Grandma Ichinaga at the airport for a one week visit. She said she missed the kids and wanted to see them again. The more likely story is that she missed me and my sarcasm ("Oh...please feel free to stay ANOTHER week...").

Grandma Ichinaga has been enjoying the company of the kids and no longer mistakes our front door for her bedroom door (see Day 11 entry). Lisa, the kids, and Grandma came to my work on Wednesday so we could all go out to lunch. I overheard Grandma Ichinaga tell my friend, Jay, that she doesn't want to say anything around me because she fears being published in the blog. She also said I tell lies in the blog. How dare you! I never lie...I just embellish with humorous exaggerations that border on lying yet thankfully teeters towards the side of truth.

I guess luck is on her side this week since I have been at work and unable to recount humorous exaggerations about her. But guess what! I have been taking a few mental notes about conversations Grandma Ichinaga has had with Lisa and I would love to share them with you right now! And as usual, I'll add a bit of humorous exaggeration but hopefully you won't be able to tell.

Humorous Exaggeration #1: Lisa and I were going to get some ice cream at Coldstones for dessert. Lisa asked her mom what is her favorite ice cream flavor? "Maple nut," Grandma Ichinaga answered. We both looked at each other confused because we've never heard of that flavor before. Lisa asked her, "What does it taste like?" Grandma answered, "Like maple nut." Lisa then slapped her mom for that silly answer.

Humorous Exaggeration #2: Grandma Ichinaga watched the movie "The Birdcage" on television. She recognized Hank Azaria playing the gay maid and said, "Wasn't he married to Henry Hunt?" Grandma then stood up and started to mime how gay people show affection.

Humorous Exaggeration #3: Grandma Ichinaga watched the television show "Survivor." During a team challenge, she commented upon the attire of the women. She said appallingly, "Look at those women. Already from the very beginning of the show they're wearing bikinis. BIKINIS! Isn't that crazy?" She then demonstrated what she was talking about by tearing up her blouse and tying it into a makeshift bikini.

Humorous Exaggeration #4: Lisa took the kids out for a stroll while Grandma stayed home watching television. While Lisa was out, she remained signed in on her AOL IM account. For those of you not familiar with it, there are occasionally odd sound effects signaling when your IM buddies sign in or out. One of Lisa's friend's IM sound is crickets. So when Grandma Ichinaga heard crickets she thought there was a cricket in the condo. Another person signed in and there was a loud creaking sound. Grandma Ichinaga thought there was someone else in the condo. She cautiously checked all of the bedrooms and the bathrooms. Unfortunately, she once again confused the front door for the bedroom door. She found herself out in the hallway, but thought it was the hallway to the bathroom. She hoped to find the bathroom, and found it. But the bathroom was actually the elevator. She entered the elevator and when she exited she confused the cigarette trash can for a toilet. As she relieved herself, she then confused a scared tenant's untucked shirt for a roll of toilet paper. The only thing that Grandma Ichinaga did not get confused about was being sent to jail for indecent exposure.

I hope Grandma Ichinaga knows I tell these stories because I find them all so cute. And if she thinks these tidbits are embarrassing, just wait until she reads the stories when my mom comes to visit later this month. Those are stories that don't need any humorous exaggerations at all.