Day 373 - Lord of the Ring

Andrew has learned a couple of rudimentary games to amuse himself -- simple games like Peek-A-Boo and Beer Pong. He has added another game to his repertoire which we shall call Get the Teething Ring Around the Changing Table Knob. If you haven't heard of this game, it's very popular in Indonesia.

Get the Teething Ring Around the Changing Table Knob has very easy instructions. What you want to do is to get the teething ring around the changing table knob. That's it! Fun for the whole family.

Here's a short video of Andrew playing the game:

Day 372 - Poll Results & New Poll

Last week I inquired what you thought when you would visit this blog and realize it hasn't been updated for days. It looks like 42% of you believe in the motto: In Scott We Trust. You know this blog will eventually get updated and will wait patiently until I get my butt in front of the computer. Disturbingly, not one of you had any concern for my cholesterol level. More disturbingly, regular readers of this blog have been sending me gift cards to The Cheesecake Factory, Hickory Farms, and Baskin Robbins. Have I really made that many enemies in my life?

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Recently, I was looking at the picture of Emma & Andrew in their pea pod costumes that is at the top of this blog. I find it so weird that in just a year they have changed so much. They're no longer little tiny peas; they're more like plump pumpkins or eggplants or even a subcompact fuel-efficient car, like a SmartCar.

Since a full year has past, I was wondering whether or not I should change the look of the blog. I would keep the title the same, but maybe I should post a more recent picture of the kids? Or maybe it would be best to keep the same picture up as a reminder of how the kids used to be? What do you think? Should I do an Obama and change it? Or should I do a McCain and keep things the same? Or should I do a Palin and put Emma in a beauty pageant and move Andrew to Alaska so he can patrol the borders for Russkies?

Day 371 - Birthday Recap

It has been one week since the kids had their first birthday party. And it has been one year since I've had a good sleep.

When people ask me what the last year has been like, I've told them it has been both slow and fast. There are times - especially in the beginning - when you wonder when this routine of sleep, poop, pee, and eat will end. You become this robot slave to the primal needs of these little blobs. But you can only wish you were a robot because at least a robot can function without sleep (screensavers don't count!).

But once the first year hits you wonder how these little poop machines have become these more human-like poop machines. Was it really just a year ago when little Emma was pooping all over Lisa's clothes? Was it really just a year ago when Andrew peed all over Lisa's face? Was it really just a year ago when Lisa kicked Scott in the balls for laughing at her? Where did the time go? Where did my balls go?

Most of you know I was not the biggest fan of throwing a sizable birthday party for the kids. My idea of the party was probably just a dozen people and a cake. Lisa's idea of the party was inviting 3 dozen friends and family members and serving a buffet table of food. Guess who won the argument? One hint: this person has a vagina. Wait a second...let me be more specific with the hint: this person has a larger vagina.

So Lisa got her way and we embarked upon this birthday party adventure. I'm not too sure why, but I've never been a big birthday party person. It could be the fact that I have few friends and my insecurity issues temper my urge to invite people for fear of rejection and abandonment which would in turn erode my already fragile ego. Not that I've really thought about this, but that is just one idea.

My big motto for this party was simplicity. I knew I would be in the middle of production for my television pilot, and Lisa would be just a few weeks into teaching her new kindergarten class. We would purchase most of the food, favors, and keep the decorations to a minimum. And despite my insistence of simplicity, we were still up until 2am the day before the party getting things ready.

My big mistake was volunteering to make these little DVD favors featuring the kids. Since the theme of the party was movies, I thought I would just edit together all of the videos I've posted on the blog the past year and burn it. No big deal right? I spent maybe thirty or forty minutes editing the piece together and started to burn it. All I had to do was burn 16 DVDs for the party. Unfortunately I did not take into account that each 15 minute DVD would take about 20 minutes to burn. So it took almost 5 1/2 hours to finish burning all of the DVDs. That's right. Let's say it all together: Scott, you're a dumbass.

But the party came together just fine and I think everyone had a good time. Sure it was exhausting and I was a walking zombie when I went to work on Monday, but the first birthday party only comes once. I'm not too sure if that's even a valid explanation because every birthday just comes once so what the hell am I trying to say? I guess what I'm trying to say is that despite my bah humbug attitude, I'm glad we did the birthday party the way we did it. So thanks to everyone and hope you enjoyed it because this ain't happening next year (Hey! My explanation was valid! I do know what I'm saying!).

Day 370 - Trimming Down

Today I did something that I could never do with Pediatric Intensive Care Nurse Auntie Susan:  I gave Emma a haircut (cue thunder and lightening).

It wasn't so much a haircut as a quick little trim.  Emma's bangs were starting to get too long and were bothering her eyes.  I, too, understand how irritating long hair can be.  Sometimes my nose hairs get too long and it begins to tickle my upper lip.

So this afternoon, we plopped Emma into her high chair and put a bib around her.  I went to the bathroom and got out my trusty nostril hair scissors.  Emma just had lunch so she was pretty calm.  Here's the way Emma looked like before her haircut:

BEFORE

As you can see, Emma's hair was a little long and shaggy.  But through the miracle of scissors and my brilliant hand/eye coordination, I was able to take a shaggy little mop of a head and turn it into a creation of infant follicle genius:

TA-DAH!

After the brief trim in the front, my confidence soared.  If I could trim bangs, I could do anything.  I read a few books, watched a few episodes of Shear Madness on Bravo, and did a quick dash to a beauty salon to purchase some product.  I put Emma in her high chair on the patio and told Lisa to interrupt me for only two things:  1) Fire and 2) a personal phone call from Megan Fox.

After a few hours, behold the beauty that is Emma:

I must say that if I wasn't straight, I could probably be a hair-cutting, musical theater loving gay man.  Wait a second...I do enjoy cutting hair and watching musical theater.  Umm.  Err.  I love female anatomy!  Boobies!  Man grunt!

As for the rest of Emma's hair, we're going to let it grow out.  I think Lisa envisions ponytails and French braids in Emma's future.  And I just envision saving $25 every couple of months.  The next step is to figure out how to trim Andrew's hair.  Does anyone know if they still sell the Flowbee?  That would be awesome...

Day 369 - Picture Friday

"Yowza!  Someone get me some deodorant!"

"Oh how droll.  I ask someone to give me a hand, and what do I get?  Hardeehar."

Just like monkeys, Andrew picks out lice, ticks, and fleas from Emma's hair.  

Little known fact, Emma was also a 16 year old Chinese girl gymnast for this summer's Olympics.

Have a great weekend!

Day 368 - Crazy Grandma Ichikawa Storytime

And now another edition of...

CRAZY GRANDMA ICHIKAWA STORYTIME!

I've mentioned before how my parents are renting my friend's place while she is working out of town.  I thought it would be a great match because my friend is very neat and my mom is very very neat.  Between the two of them dust bunnies won't have a chance to thrive.  

But what I thought would be a heavenly pairing has turned into a bit of a paranoid and tense situation for my mom.  Because my friend is neat, my mom wants to make sure everything is perfect when she leaves.  And this is causing a considerable amount of bad luck and stress for my mom.

Earlier this week, my friend told me she had a potential renter for her place after my parents leave.  So I told my parents that this person was going to come see the apartment on Wednesday between 7-8pm.  To a normal person, this would not be a big deal.  But to Crazy Grandma Ichikawa, this meant she needed to clean the place.

After my parents finished babysitting the kids on Wednesday, my mom returned to their place to tidy up the condo.  She put away all of the clutter, she vacuumed, she dusted, she made sure the bathroom and bedroom looked neat and organized.  I wouldn't be surprised if she used a toothbrush around the inside of the toilet bowl.  It probably took her at least an hour or so to make the condo presentable for this person.

Well guess what.  She never showed up.

My dad was IMing me while the news arrived of this person bailing.  The conversation went a little something like this:

scottonewa:  So I heard the person didn't show up.

pimpdawgichikawa:  yup.  mom is mad.  mad mad mad.  not happy.  mad.  mad mad.

Seriously.  My dad typed the word 'mad' at least eight times.  And I could totally see my mom angry and saying incorrect colloquialisms.

"Oh.  I'm as mad as a horny nest!  I'm starch raining mad!  This woman starting off on the wrong food."

But the thing that makes this funny is that on top of this, all of these other things have been happening to my mom at my friend's place.  For instance when my mom was cleaning up the bathroom to get ready for this potential renter, my mom dusted this glass jar full of little soap bars.  When she put the glass lid back on the jar, the lid cracked!  So my mom freaked out and called me.

"Oh no! Scotty!  I dink I cracked a jar in dah bathsroom!"

So now my mom is going to go to Cost Plus or something other store to buy a new jar for my friend.

Another time, my mom closed the fridge door shut.  And then a few seconds later a bottle rolled off the top of the fridge and fell to the floor.

"Oh no!  Scotty!  I dink I closed dah weefridgahwaytah and den a bottle fell from dah ceiling!"

Thankfully, the bottle didn't break.  But the bottle has now found a new home on top of the counter and not the fridge.

The result of all of this bad luck from my mom is that my parents have began to eat all of their food off paper plates.  My mom only has a few weeks left here in Los Angeles, and she swears she's going to leave the condo in the exact same condition it was in when they started living there.

Or as my mom would say, "Dah day I leave a place dirtier is dah day when Hell fajitas over."

Day 367 - Cartoon Wednesday

Day 366 - Catch Up!

I've finally had a little time and energy to update the blog. I've posted something for the past three days so take a look!

We finally shoot this television pilot on Thursday night, so once we begin to wrap production I should slowly gain my energy back. I'm hoping Lisa might find a little time to do a cartoon for Cartoon Wednesday or even do a little entry for Thursday because I know I won't have the time to do it. But in the upcoming days, I'll have another cartoon up, a Crazy Grandma Ichikawa story, Picture Friday, and a more detailed recap of Emma's and Andrew's first birthday party.

And with that...I'm going to sleep. Zzz...

Day 365 - Poll Results & New Poll

Last week I asked if you thought Lisa and I had too many barriers around our house. Granted it's not as heavily fenced as say Texas, but we do have quite a few gates around the place. Sixty percent of you believed we were not overdoing it, and thirty percent of you thought we were being too restrictive with our kids. What I conclude from the poll results is that thirty percent of you do not have kids. So why don't you just get in your tiny two-seat convertible and grab yourself a cup of Pinkberry. Humph....

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As you have noticed, I have been quite behind on this blog the past few weeks. I've got to say that I've been pretty tired from work due to my heavy work load and long hours. Last Friday, I didn't get home until 11pm. And I didn't get home until 1am on Saturday. Granted, I was at a strip club, but that was very tiring too. My thighs still ache.

I was just curious what all of you think when you visit the blog and it's the same old Crazy Grandma Ichikawa story day after day. Are you upset that the blog hasn't been updated? Are you understanding? Or do you question your social life when you realize you are reading a blog about someone else's twins?

Day 364 - Birthday Pics

Today was Emma's and Andrew's first birthday. I'll write much more about it this upcoming weekend, but I thought I would just share a couple of pictures with you for the time being. If I'm up to it, I'll try to edit together a quick little video of the party for this weekend's entry. And if I'm really up to it, I'll buy a large piece of marble and chisel a statue of the kids at their birthday party.

Briefly, I think everyone had a good time. Both Lisa and I were in a bit of a daze because we stayed up pretty late the night before trying to get everything ready. Even though the party wasn't that large, there was plenty to do. Lisa had to tell me to make a sign, Lisa had to tell me to make party favors, Lisa had to tell me to wrap the party favors, Lisa had to tell me to go to Costco and buy food, and Lisa had to call me a 'dumbass' at least seven times on four separate occasions. Wow! No wonder we were so tired!

We couldn't hang the banner on the wall because there wasn't enough staples to keep the kids from falling off the sign.

Fire: Friend or foe?

"Hello, my sweet tasty morsel of a friend."

"This fire intrigues me!"

"Mmm. Fire tastes good!"

Fisher Price My First Hybrid.

Moments before the propeller slices Emma's right arm off.

Happy birthday!!!

Day 363 - Step Two...

I have a couple of recurring nightmares. One of them has me getting plastic surgery and coming out looking like Dr. Bunsen Honeydew. Another one is about my death and becoming reincarnated into a thong worn by Delta Burke. And the last one has the twins learning to walk at the same time. Sadly, two out of three of my nightmares have come true.

As I have mentioned before, Andrew doesn't have much patience for balancing and walking and standing and waiting; he'll never make it in Cirque du Soleil. But when he does try to walk, he often takes quite a few steps by pure luck, and more importantly, pure gravity.

Just by luck, Lisa caught Andrew taking more than a few steps before crashing to the ground and breaking both legs, left forearm, and nose. But it was all worth it for this video.

Day 362 - Picture Friday

Here's a special Picture Friday: 12 pictures of Emma and Andrew taken every month. Enjoy!

Have a great weekend!

Day 361 - First Steps

All along I thought Andrew would be the first one to take a step, but lo and behold I was wrong. Only in retrospect does it make sense that Emma would be the first one to take a step. Andrew is the type of baby who is always on the go and is curious about everything that is out of his reach. Learning to walk takes too long when you can just cruise on all fours across the rug. But Emma's demeanor is much more calm, and she likes to examine little details. So she doesn't have the need for speed.

Although Emma walks like a drunken hobo, she gets a little better every day (unlike a drunken hobo). Before long she will probably be able to walk across the room.

Here's a quick little video of Emma taking a few steps!

Day 360 - Cartoon Wednesday

Day 359 - Sherpa in Training

I have a scary feeling that our safety gates and furniture barriers will soon become a futile attempt to keep Andrew out of danger (i.e. flat screen plasma toppling on his wee head.).

Yesterday Lisa called me at work in a frantic saying, "Guess what happened? Guess what happened?" I immediately told her that two is enough and began to search for nearby adoption agencies. After Lisa told me I was a dumbass, she explained why she was in such a snit: Andrew learned to climb.

That's right. Andrew now knows how to climb on top of the sofa. I'm not too sure how he was able to do it with his scrawny arms and legs, but he somehow pulled himself up. I assume this will have some effect on how we will supervise the kids at home. My initial solution to this potential problem was to bound Andrew's legs, but the only thing I got out of that is how much it hurts my heart every time Lisa calls me a dumbass.

Here's a video of Andrew climbing!

Day 358 - Poll Results and New Poll

Last week I asked your geekier side to help me decide whether or not I should purchase a new camcorder. Forty-two percent believed I should purchase a flash memory/hard drive camcorder. Thankfully only one person voted that I should not purchase a new camcorder, and I should just use what I already have. To that person I say, "Leave me alone, Auntie Anne."

I actually did purchase a new camcorder this past weekend -- which is partially why you are seeing more videos on the blog. When I was first researching camcorders, I was all set to buy a HD camcorder. But after doing a little research, I realized my current computers (Yes, plural. Leave me alone, Auntie Anne...) wouldn't have the power to edit the video quickly. So instead, I decided to buy a flash card memory camcorder which would be very light, portable, and easy to mount on the foot of our bed.

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If you ever dare visit us, you will notice that we have safety gates and furniture all over our place blocking the kids from entering restricted areas. The current restricted areas are the kitchen, bathrooms, our bedroom, the television area, and the meth lab. It won't be too long before Emma & Andrew figure out a way to get into these areas, but for the time being our barriers work.

When we visit other homes with kids, we don't notice as many areas that are blocked off. Maybe they don't care that their child might play with pans in the kitchen or needles in the meth lab. This got me to thinking that maybe we are keeping our kids away from exploring and being free to roam. What do you think? Do you think we need to be more relaxed or should we keep on doing what is working?

Day 357 - Good Eats

After a meal, we give the kids a tasty little treat called Apple Wagon Wheels. They are "puffed grain with real apples" and "naturally flavored with other natural flavors." Looking at the list of ingredients I can only assume by natural flavors they mean dicalcium phosphate, mixed tocopherolis, zinc sulfate, alpha tocopheryl, and soy lecithin. Who doesn't enjoy a little mixed tocopherolis in their food? Actually I think a girl in college gave me alpha tocopheryl, but a little talcum powder cleared that up.

What Lisa and I find interesting is how stereotypically boyish and girlish our kids are. Emma can sit down and calmly play with her toys or just serenely gaze outside pondering the adventures that lie ahead. As for Andrew, he can't stay in one place for more than two seconds and wants to hit, smack, and grab everything in sight. The only thing that Andrew does that is slightly girlish is his interest in wearing panty hose.

These gender stereotypes carry over into the realm of eating too. I took some video of our kids eating these Apple Wagon Wheels and look at the difference:

Day 356 - Peek-a-Boo-Boo

If you look at the picture to your right, this is where Andrew usually plays peek-a-boo.  Right around that wall is their bedroom.  So Andrew will poke out his head, crawl into the bedroom, then return sticking his head out from the corner giggling like a jolly Japanese girl visiting Disneyland for he first time.

Today, Andrew was playing peek-a-boo with me at this very location.  Andrew stuck his head out, giggled, then retreated to the bedroom.  Again, Andrew stuck his head out, giggled, then retreated to the bedroom.  One final time, Andrew stuck his head out, giggled, then instead of retreating to the bedroom he slammed his head against the wall.

Doh.

At first, Andrew looked shocked.  He had no idea when or how this wall appeared.  Then his little face twisted into a face of anger and pain.  He wanted to sue the construction company who built this wall that hit his face.

I picked him up and after a little cuddling and Cheerios, he calmed down.  Hopefully, Andrew will be a little more careful the next time and take heed to the wall.  Although I don't think Andrew has forgiven the wall yet because he just peed on it.

Day 355 - Picture Friday

This is what we like to call pre-ass crashing.

Andrew smothers Emma with love...literally.

Where's dat wascally wabbit? Uh huhuhuhuhuhuh.

Emma imagines what life would be like with a mustache.


Have a great weekend! Woof woof!

Day 354 - Peek A Boo!

Although Andrew has always enjoyed us playing peek-a-boo with him, he has started to learn the concept on his own. He has started to hide his face with blankets or around a corner and play peek-a-boo with us. Here's a little video of Andrew playing peek-a-boo.

Day 353 - Cartoon Wednesday

Day 352 - Road Trip Tales

Instead of my usual stream of consciousness ramblings about our road trips with the twins, I thought I would present this past weekend's anecdotes as a collection of short stories. So pull yourself up to the computer monitor, minimize that window of streaming porn, and enjoy these true life tales of horror.

TALES FROM THE CRIB
At the last minute, Lisa and I decided to drive to Santa Clara on Thursday night. I got home from work around 7:30pm, and we quickly packed up our weekend essentials: clothing, toiletries, and cheerios. After gassing up, we were on the freeway by 9:40pm.

I made a pact with Lisa that I would drive to Santa Clara if she would be responsible for waking up early and feed the kids in the morning. Lisa agreed, and spit in her palm for a handshake. I quickly slapped Lisa's saliva-soaked hand into her face and chortled a merry laugh. Silly wife.

For practically the entire trip, Lisa was asleep. Her ability to contort her body in weird positions yet still be able to sleep kept me entertained. There were times when only her seatbelt kept her head from hitting the dashboard. There were also times when her seatbelt did not keep her head from hitting the dashboard because I slammed the car brakes on purpose.

We made good time, and pulled into Grandma Ichinaga's driveway around 2:15am. The kids slept the entire trip, but we had to wake them up to get them out of their car seats. Emma & Andrew rubbed their sleepy eyes, and we carried them to their cribs. After checking for poopy diapers, we put the kids into bed and walked out to continue unpacking.

But unpacking would have to wait for screams of terror and confusion. Lisa and I underestimated our kids' ability to think. All this time, we thought our kids were slightly Gumpish, but this seems to be far from the truth. Emma & Andrew knew they were not in their own cribs; they wanted to be home.

To make matters worse, Grandma Ichinaga came out from her bedroom to see the kids. She was wearing curlers and a kerchief over her head. She basically looked like the Unibomber after getting a perm. She approached Andrew to say hi. Well you'd think Andrew was about to be touched by Michael Jackson's left glove. He stared at Grandma, and jolted back with a loud cry for help from the remaining Jackson Five.

It was almost 4am before the kids finally settled down and went to sleep. Not too long after that Lisa and I fell asleep too. I was especially comfy in bed knowing I would not have to wake early to take care of the kids. Around 7:30am, the kids began to whine for their morning bottle. As promised, Lisa got out of bed as I rolled over and took her pillow for myself. Ahhh.

But at 7:33am, Lisa got back into bed. I was confused. Lisa told me her mom and sister volunteered to feed the kids so she could sleep more. As I returned Lisa's pillow to her, I no longer felt comfy as Lisa smiled and laughed herself to sleep.

NOT SUITABLE FOR ALL AGES
Have you ever tried to dress an eleven month year old hyperactive boy into a tuxedo when it's almost 95 degrees outside and there's no central A/C inside?

DON'T! FOR THE LOVE OF BUDDHA...DON'T!

Lisa's friend, Samantha, let us borrow this baby tuxedo for Andrew. Lisa, Pediatric Intensive Care Nurse Auntie Susan, and Grandma Ichinaga were all very excited to see little Andrew in tuxedo pants and a black bow tie. I, on the other hand, was not.

After waking up from their afternoon nap on Saturday, we had to dress the kids in their fancy clothes. I was already wearing my suit and ready to leave. Lisa was in charge of Emma, and I was in charge of Andrew. Well once again, Lisa had it easy. I mean how difficult is it to put on a dress? I wear one every Saturday night, and it's a piece of cake (and quite refreshing for the undergarments!).

As for Andrew, I had to put on dress socks, tuxedo pants, a long sleeve buttoned shirt, a vest, and a damn bow tie. It's hard enough changing his diaper let alone an entire trunk of clothing. Andrew would turn to the left. Turn to the right. Kick his legs down. Kick his legs up (into my testicles). Roll on his back. Roll on his tummy. I swear this is more difficult and tiring than thirty minutes on the Wii Fit.

After finally getting him dressing, I was drenched in sweat. But I will admit it was mostly worth it because both Emma & Andrew were quite cute. As for Daddy, he was sweaty and cheated out of an extra four and a half hours of sleep that well-rested Mommy got. Son of a...

McDONALD McCONFUSION
Upon our drive back to Los Angeles on Sunday, we stopped off at a McDonald's for dinner. We had dinner ready for Emma & Andrew in our tupperware, and we just decided to have a snack since my mom had food ready for us at home.

Since I was still deprived of that four and a half hours of sleep, I needed a cup of coffee. Since it was getting a little late, I decided to get a half-caf cup of coffee. My conversation with the McDonald cashier went a bit like this:

Scott: I would like a medium half-caf.

McCashier: (looks around) A wha?

Scott: A half-caf cup of coffee please.

McCashier: (looks at the coffee menu) There ain't no half-caf, sir.

Scott: I just want half regular and half decaf coffee.

McCashier: So...you want two cups of coffee?

Scott: No. One cup of coffee. But just half regular and half decaf coffee.

McCashier: In the same cup?

Scott: Yes. That's why it's called half-caf. Half caffeinated and half decaffeinated coffee.

McCashier: I never heard of that before. That's weird.

McCashier #2: (to McCashier) Do you need me to get that cup of coffee for you?

McCashier: Yah. This man wants a...

McCashier thinks better of it.

McCashier: (to McCashier #2) Never mind. I better get that order. You won't understand.

A few minutes pass and McCashier gives Scott the food.

McCashier: Here's your food and coffee, sir.

Scott: Thanks.

McCashier: I guess you learn something new every day, huh?

Scott: Umm...what?

McCashier: Half-caf. I never heard of that!That's crazy! HAHAHA!

In retrospect, I felt a little LA-ish asking for a half-caf, but I didn't think in this age of Starbucks and Coffee Bean that this would be such a strange request. Stranger still, the McCashier and I hit it off and she is now my secret McMistress.

Day 351 - Poll Result & New Poll

Last week, I asked whether or not I was cheating on the Wii Fit because I weighed myself after emptying out the butt closet. I'm glad to report that 70% of you do not believe I was cheating. Yet 100% of you hope I will no longer talk about my bowel movements, and it was way too much information to know that my poops weigh several pounds.

I say jealousy of my poopies will get you nowhere, and you're just full of crap. Literally.

**********

With the impending one year mark of the kids being pushed out of Lisa's cut-up belly (Hey! Now that's a major weight loss on the Wii Fit!), I have begun to have mixed and complicated emotions. I'm not talking about emotions dealing with the kids growing up so fast and time being so fleeting. I'm talking about emotions dealing with whether or not I should buy a new camcorder.

I have this camcorder that's about five years old, but it still works. But there are a lot of camcorders on the market now that are a lot more convenient, smaller, and just plain geekier. I figure with so many celebrations approaching (birthdays, Halloween, Christmas, Scott's gallbladder operation anniversary), it might be a good time to think about a new camcorder. But what kind should I get? A cheap portable Flip? A smallish flash card or hard drive camera? A new spiffy hi-def? Or perhaps an old fashioned 3-d Viewmaster?

Day 350 - Too Damn Lazy

Due to lack of sleep and laziness, I will write all about our crazy road trip with the twins on Tuesday. But here's a taste of weirdness with this snippet of a conversation I had with my mom. We were driving back to Los Angeles and I wanted to tell her how much longer it would take.

Crazy Grandma Ichikawa: How much farther do you have to go?

Scott: Oh. About 120 miles left.

Crazy Granda Ichikawa: So about an hour?

How fast does she think I'm driving? With my mom's crazy math, she literally believes it takes 20 minutes to get anywhere from Los Angeles: Downtown, Long Beach, Malibu, Egypt, Antarctica, Peru, Sydney, and Puerto Rico. She could probably drive around the world in 40 minutes. Until Tuesday...

Day 349 - Pictures from Santa Clara

Here are some pictures from Santa Clara. The first
few pictures are from a birthday party Lisa's family
threw for kids. They decided to celebrate their
1st birthday a little early. Then the rest of the pictures
are from Kevin & Shelvey's wedding. Wish us luck
on the drive back. Or rather...wish ME luck
on the drive back.

Day 348 - Picture Friday

Here are some pictures of the wedding we went to in San Jose. Congratulations Kevin & Shelvey!

Andrew makes some last minute changes to his Best Baby speech.

Daddy's two biatches.

"Do you really expect me to be able to reach that Cheerio in your hand when I'm strapped into this contraption? Idiot..."

Andrew & Emma had to be helped to the car after one too many drinks.

Have a great life!