Day 460 - Crazy Grandma Ichikawa Storytime

Break out the bubbly and snap on your rice patty hats because here is the last entry of 2008 for...Crazy Grandma Ichikawa Storytime!

COOKIE MOMSTER

When we left Santa Clara, Lisa's sister, Pediatric Intensive Care Nurse Auntie Susan, gave us a box of homemade holiday cookies. I love cookies. If there was a movie like Sophie's Choice where I had to make a decision between the kids or a freshly baked sheet of chocolate chip cookies, let's just say you better grab me a glass of cold milk and sell the kid's stuff on Craigslist.

Through the day, we were all snacking on the cookies. Suddenly, the cookie box disappeared. Not in the living room. Not in the kitchen. Not in Emma's crib. Where did the cookies go? I'll tell you where. My mom hid the cookie box in her bedroom!

"Mom? Where did you put the cookies?" I asked.

"You guys eating too much of my cookies! I hid dem! You nevah find!" cackled Crazy Grandma.

I'm not too sure how Crazy Grandma got the idea that the entire box of cookies belonged to her, but it's not too surprising. In the past she has also hoarded a bucket of fried chicken, a bag of rice, and a box of Bagel Bites.

Of course I went snooping through her bedroom looking for the cookies. Awkwardly, I found all of the cookies in her underwear drawer. Odd hiding place, but no less odd than Lisa stashing tampons in a rainstick.

I took out all of the cookies, and replaced it with a note. The note said: Thanks for the cookies! Love Emma.

Last night, Crazy Grandma craved some cookies. So she went into her underwear drawer only to find an empty bag with a note from Emma. From across the house, you could hear Crazy Grandma shout, "Heeeeeeeeeeeeey! Where maaaaaaaaaaah coooooooooooookies?!?!?!" with a weird vocal mix of Fat Albert, Cookie Monster, and Mickey Rooney in "Breakfast at Tiffany's."

AT THE MOVIES

We rented several movies at Blockbuster over the holiday break, and my mom had interesting commentary for each one.

"Eagle Eye"
For the first ten to fifteen minutes of the movie, my mom was trying to figure out who/what was Eagle Eye. There was a close-up of a missile, and my mom said, "Is dat eagle eye?" Cut to a close-up of a terrorist. "Oh! Dat eagle eye?" Pan to a government agent. "Maybe dat eagle eye?" Soon she gave up and fell asleep. She woke up at the very end of the movie to find out what Eagle Eye was all about. She then said with wisdom, "I knew dat was eagle eye!"

"Mamma Mia"
For the first ten to fifteen minutes of the movie, my mom was trying to figure out who was the father of the daughter. Close-up of Pierce Brosnan. "He dah father!" Close-up of Colin Firth. "He dah father!" Close-up of Stellan Skarsgard. "He dah father!" Once again, she gave up and fell asleep. Again, she woke up at the very end of the movie to find out what happened. She then said with even more wisdom than the last time, "Dat stoopid."

"The Dark Knight"
An hour into the movie, my mom said, "Is this Iron Man?"