Thursday, December 4, 2008

Day 436 - Kiss and Tell

Every night Lisa and I do a bedtime ritual with the kids. First, I wind up this mobile that my aunt gave me when I was a baby. It plays this Japanese lullaby and twirls cherry blossom leaves around a red dog and a canary in a cage. I'm not 100% sure what the name of the lullaby is but I think it translates to "Twirl Cherry Blossom Leaves Around a Red Dog and a Canary in a Cage." I usually wind up the music box on the mobile long enough so it lasts about a minute. But during those days when Lisa and I are tired, I give it a short twist and tell the kids, "I think Grandma broke it."

After that, we go to the little hallway next to their closet. At the end of the wall is a vanity mirror. We have one kid turn on the light switch, and then we say good night to our reflection in the mirror. The kids seem to enjoy this because they start smiling and waving at themselves; I just think it's goofy. Then the other kid turns off the light, and Lisa and I switch kids.

At this point, it becomes an improv session with the kids. Sometimes they might point to the fishes on the wall. Or they might point to their names on the wall. Or they might point outside the window wondering why our next-door neighbors are naked on their balcony playing horsey.

Before we put the kids into their cribs, we ask the kids for a kiss or a hug. So far it has not been successful. This doesn't surprise me because for much of my life anytime I have asked for a hug or a kiss I have been either denied or slapped. And if I was lucky, both.

Tonight, I was about to put Emma down when she planted her mouth on my chin. At first I was wondering if I had some deli meat there, but my chin was clean. So to double check, I asked Emma, "Kiss?" And she did the same thing again! What joy it is to experience a kiss again when the last time it happened was during my wedding ceremony. And for the record, kissing guys do not count.

Lisa saw what happened and took Emma from my arms.

"Kiss?" asked Lisa.


"Kiss, Mommy?"

Nothing again.

Lisa asked one more time. "Kiss kiss?"

And then Emma answered, "Bitch! No means no! Put my ass down in my crib!"

So if you're keeping count on who has been kissed, it's 1 for Scott and 0 for Lisa. But if you've been keeping tabs on us since grade school, the it's 1 for Scott and 345,876 for Lisa. And for the record, kissing lingerie models from the pages of the Sears catalog circa 1986 does not count...although it would be pretty much even then.

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