Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Day 1329 - Lice Scream!

I suppose it is inevitable with any preschool that you eventually receive the dreaded lice memo.  We received a memo explaining that a child at the preschool had lice, and what precautions to take.  My first instinct was to get a razor and go all buddha on our kids.  But after reading a little more about lice, it really isn't the all-out panic that it is cut out to be.

First of all, lice isn't dangerous and can't spread disease.  If your kid gets a bad case of lice, all of the itching and scratching could cause an infection, but that's the probably the worst-case scenario.  Well, I suppose the worst-case scenario could be that there are lice eggs all over your kid's eyebrows, eyelashes, and nostril hairs...but let's not think about that, shall we?

In order to get rid of the lice, you could use a medicated shampoo, but many people do not like using it because it is basically an insecticide; it's a bit like pouring Raid and Johnson & Johnson shampoo into a Magic Bullet for a few seconds.  So the next best thing to do is to constantly look for lice in your kid's hair.  If you do find lice, you should use a metallic nit comb to get all of the lice and eggs out of the hair.  And what to do with all of the lice and eggs you comb out?  Do what I do and make a nice pesto sauce for dinner.

What can you do to prevent your child from getting lice?  I read this online article about prevention, and it was obvious the closest the writer ever got to a baby was probably a Cabbage Patch Kid in the 1980s. 

The first thing the article recommended was to avoid head-to-head contact with other children.  I think head-to-head contact is the least of your worries when you have toddlers actually exchanging spit, boogies, and the occasional splatter of urine with their classmates. 

The second recommendation was to teach your kid not to share combs, brushes, hats, bows, helmets, and other assorted items that may be on another child's head.  Once again, this writer has never been around toddlers because parents know how useful it is when they say, "Please do not do that."  Might as well go to a lice farm and call it a day.

Thankfully, there has been no sign of lice at home so I think we can shout out an all-clear signal.  For some reason, lice has this dirty stigma attached to it, but after reading up on it, it's no worse than other common diseases like chlamydia and herpes.  I mean...chlamydia and herpes are common, right?  Hello?  Where'd everyone go?

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