Saturday, December 10, 2011

Day 1508 - The Scariest Place on Earth

We have finally cemented ourselves as a stereotypical Japanese family in Los Angeles:  we purchased annual passes for Disneyland.  Since the kids were three, we've taken them to Disneyland twice a year:  during the spring and the winter for the holiday decorations.  And if we went one more time, then that would be more than the cost of the annual pass for the four of us.  Of course, the passes were so expensive we had to sell one of the kids, but at least the remaining child will have a fun 2012.

It is a little eye-opening to take the kids to Disneyland every six months or so because each time it's a little different.   When they were three, they were just luggage in a stroller.  But now they have their own very strong opinions on what they like, what they don't like, and what they want to try.  In other words, never take a four year old on the Haunted Mansion.

Overall, the kids had a great day at Disneyland.  But I'd have to say Andrew had a better day than Emma because there were three things that happened to her that she did not like at all.  The first thing was the new Little Mermaid ride.  I was most concerned about the scene with Ursula since the kids have a fear of large things and Pat Carroll, but Emma freaked out within the first minute of the ride!

Right at the beginning, there's a portion where your seashell tilts backwards and you "enter" the ocean.  A gust of wind and digital projections of water and bubbles surround you.  Emma did not like this.  She screamed.  She cried.  She kicked my balls.  And by the time she calmed down, guess what the next scene was?  Yup, Pat Carroll singing.

When we exited the ride, I asked the kids if they enjoyed it.  Andrew said his usual "Yup", but Emma pulled me down to her level and said, "I did NOT like the Little Mermaid ride.  I do NOT want to ride it again."  I guess we won't be a part of that world for another year or so.

The second thing that happened was when we decided to watch Fantasmic.  We explained to the kids what was going to happen and how it would be loud and how the dragon at the end of the show was a pretend dragon because the real dragon was on the press tour for How to Train Your Dragon

The lights dimmed and the show began.  It starts off simple enough with spotlights, loud music, and Mickey Mouse.  But once the water screens appeared and scenes of surreal animation were projected, Emma jumped out of the stroller and hid.

Emma started to mumble something at me, but I wasn't able to hear her.  I asked her to talk louder.  She mumbled something again.  One last time, I told her to talk even louder.

"WHY DO YOU MAKE ME WATCH THESE THINGS, DADDY?!?!?!?!?" Emma screamed.  And that was the end of Fantasmic.

The last thing that happened to Emma was right before the fireworks were going to start.  As we were leaving Fantasmic, the fireworks were to begin in about 15 minutes.  So we decided to park the stroller at the end of Main Street to watch the pyrotechnics.  The kids were getting a little tired and grumpy, but were looking forward to the "snow" at the end of the fireworks.

Emma was sitting in the stroller when she asked me if I could carry her a little.  Since I've been working out, I was anxious to try out my new "guns".  So I put my hands out in front of her to pick her up, but then she tossed her head into my hands.  I felt something moist.  Oh boy...I hope it was her nose or her mouth.  Nope.  It was her eye.

Soon the fireworks started early.  And by that I mean the fireworks coming out of Emma's lungs.  I looked at Emma's eye and there was a spot of red.  I figured I would get a small bag of ice for her.  So I ran down Main Street screaming "Annual passholder needs ice!  Please move!  Annual passholder coming through!"

When I returned with some ice, Emma was calm.  She ended up eating the ice more than putting it on her eye.  She told me her eye didn't hurt, and she could see fine.  I even grabbed my phone and Googled "red eye caused by guilt-ridden father's finger"".  And it looked like Emma would just have a bloody eye for about a week.

The firework show was nice, the kids enjoyed watching the pretend snow, and we left the park a happy family.  And best of all, the souvenir we received was free:  Emma's bloody eye.

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