Day 104 - Read All About It

When your child is having a baby, it's the headline of the metro section. When your child is having twins, it's not only the headline of the front page, but it is also that annoying plastic bag advertisement that you have to remove to actually read the newspaper.

This morning, Lisa drove her mom to the local Safeway grocery store to do some shopping. When they got there, Lisa said her mom was that cute little lady that everybody knows.

"Hello, Sumi!"

"Good morning, Sumi!"

"Meet me behind the loading dock for your 'medication,' Sumi!"

After checking off the items on their list, they began their check-out with a cashier named Linda. Sumi introduced Lisa to Linda.

"Oh! You're Lisa! I've heard so much about you. Where are the twins?"

As I said, when you have twins everybody knows. Lisa explained to Linda that the twins were at home sleeping.

"Aw. That's too bad. I would've liked to have seen them," said a disappointed Linda. "Who's watching them?"

"My husband," answered Lisa.

"You mean the one who has no job?" responded Linda flatly with perhaps a smidgen of judgment.

I thought my lack of employment might've been an article tucked away within the Metro section next to a futon clearance sale advertisement. But I guess in the Ichinaga household my unemployment is also front page news.

Also on a different story, but the same general theme of everybody knowing something, our nephews, Jason and Jacob, visited today. Lisa told them I brought my Wii and they could come over after school to play it.

As our nephews were playing, Andrew and Emma woke up from their nap. We brought them out and they were quietly watching Jason and Jacob playing the Wii. In between turns, Jason, 8, started to look at Andrew and Emma. He looked back and forth really hard at them and then came to this conclusion.

He pointed to Andrew and said, "Little head." Then he pointed to Emma and said, "Big head. She has such a big head."

I'm sure Emma would've said something back if she wasn't so busy sucking down formula.

Day 103 - Bidin' Our Time

Today we drove to Santa Clara for one last stop before we head back home to Los Angeles. Once again I would like to thank the AMPTP and the WGA for not negotiating because without you we would not be able to spend so much time with our families. Ideally, I'd love to spend the entire season of Spring with my family so let's hope for a really slow end to the strike. Hell, I'm going to be greedy and ask for Summer too.

It's really quite unbelievable how much time it takes to leave one city for another city. Granted this is our first big road trip with the kids and hopefully we'll be able to travel a little lighter and faster in the future. On the next trip, I'm sure I can get our new SUV up to 95 mph and Emma will have lost a few pounds. It's just such a chore to pack everything up that was organized and then unpack it again into a semblance of organization again.

Thankfully both Lisa and I are pretty organized because I really do think that's the key to traveling with twins. Before we left, Lisa made a checklist of things we would need. Everything from activity mats to zanex. Smaller items were placed in labeled ziploc bags. And then when we unpacked, we designated different areas of the room with specific items. For instance, one corner of the room would be our changing area, the top of the desk would have all of our bathing items, and the underside of our mattress would continue to hold my porno mags from middle school.

We will spend another five days here in Santa Clara and it should be pretty relaxing. There's suppose to be a big storm coming into the Bay Area with a high wind advisory (insert baby farting jokes here) so that'll limit how much we go out with the kids. Tomorrow we're going out to lunch with Lisa's mom and sister, and Auntie Susan volunteered her time to watch the kids if we wanted to see a movie. On Saturday, we're hoping to hook up with my friend for brunch. And besides seeing Lisa's family throughout the week that should be it.

As for the kids, they are keeping themselves busy. I've included some pictures of Andrew to show you his typical day.

8am
Andrew believes having no teeth is no excuse for a lack of dental hygiene.

8:25am
After flossing his gums, Andrew trims his sideburns.

12:15pm
Despite having to be held over the stove and not having the ability to grab things, Andrew perseveres and makes a delicious lunch of boiling mama's milk.

6:15pm
After looking for dangling participles in Daddy's blog, the computer is turned off by Andrew.

Day 102 - Observations on Emma

While sitting here in the living room carrying the kids and waiting to go to great-grandma's house for lunch, a couple of observations about Emma has been made.

The first one is that a theory has been made about Emma's demeanor. Emma can be quite the tempest of a girl when she's hungry, tired, and/or uncomfortable. Usually holding her or shoving mama's tatas in her mouth is the prescribed medicine for her anger ills. But why so angry, my little punim?

As Lisa was holding Emma over her shoulder, I took this picture of Emma's noggin that answers our question. Does that hair pattern remind you of anything besides a balding uncle? That's right, my amateur meteorologists! It looks like the eye of a hurricane. Move over Katrina, Emma is about to hit with a devastating combination of wind, spit, and pee.

The second observation made is by my mom. Grandma Ichikawa was changing Emma's diaper on this changing mat in front of the television. When she took off Emma's diaper, she slapped her thighs and said, "Look at all dis meat! You would get good money at a butcher!"

Thank you, Hannibal Grandma. Remind us not to have you babysit Emma on an empty stomach.

Day 102 - Happy New Year 2008

"HA pee neww yearz eh-vry bahdee! Naw lets mee finish mah bottle ohf veeno, peeps!"

Day 101 - New Year's Resolutions

Since it is about to be 2008, I asked our kids their list of resolutions. I had no idea what the hell they were saying to me, so I called up my cousin who is a baby translator at the United Nations. He spoke to Andrew and Emma and told me what they said.

ANDREW'S RESOLUTIONS

1. Look less like a monkey.
2. Stop pooping in the tub.
3. Learn Latin.
4. Gain enough weight to actually fit in Grandma's winter parka.
5. Differentiate between Mom's and Dad's nipples.

EMMA'S RESOLUTIONS

1. Look less like Costanza, more like Elaine.
2. Grow enough hair to wear a barrette.
3. Take up yoga (perhaps with using one of those beautiful Beinjoy yoga mats!).
4. Work on more facial expressions besides hungry and pissed.
5. Stop smoking.

Everyone have a Happy New Year and a great 2008. And remember: don't drink and drive (Lisa tried breastfeeding while driving and boy was that a disaster)!

Day 99 - Grandma Be Illin'

The main reason why my mom did not want us to travel with the kids is because she did not want them to get sick. So it is of no surprise that ever since we've arrived in Sacramento the kids have been on Grandma house arrest. Andrew & Emma tried making a break for it, but since they don't know how to crawl they just fell out of the bed and cried for an hour.

I've tried to explain to my mom that being cold isn't going to make you sick, but she refuses to believe it. Then again she also believes Dancing With the Stars is an actual sport and betamax will make a comeback.

So how ironic that the other day my mom came down with a cold. And although she forbids our kids to go anywhere outside of the house it's perfectly fine to be home with the sick and invalid. And to top it all off, she still wants to hold the kids! At least, she washes her hands thoroughly and wears a surgical mask when she's near them. Hopefully the kids won't show any signs of a cold in the next few days. So far so good!

More importantly, I hope the kids don't associate Grandma with another person whose photo I have pasted down below.

Grandma

Not Grandma.

Day 99 - Christmas Pics

I suppose we are going to make our annual trek to the casinos shortly, so here are some pictures from the past few days. Hopefully we'll have good luck and not have to ante up one of the kids.